Back in the Saddle Again: Newborn Nights


Remember that sound? The sound that can strike fear into the hearts of all parents? That tiny cooing somewhere in the darkness at 2AM?

Nope, it’s not the blob, it’s the sound of your newborn waking up for another cluster feed. Guess who’s hearing all of those old familiar sounds again… this girl.

baby girl

That’s right, baby number two, the final installment of the Gordon clan touched down March 25th and once again our house is filled with the sounds of breast pumps and coffee machines.

I had forgotten so much of the little newborn “nuances” that my husband and I had gone through with our son. The diaper blow outs, the empty bottles of gripe water, the burp clothes, used and unused stationed around the house, the Everest piles of dirty dishes, the one handed meals, the endless breast feeding sessions.

Then there’s your body. I had forgotten how much leaking a human body does after birth and when milk comes in. I feel like I’m sticky and oozing twenty four hours a day. The laundry that’s piling up? It’s not just because I have two kids. I go through t-shirts like Donald Trump goes through apprentices. I wake up with two swimming pools where fabric should be. Old theater t-shirt from 1994? You’re fired!

Have you ever seen the movie “Pan’s Labyrinth”? If you haven’t, you need to look up a picture of “the skinny fat man” online and get a good picture as to how my stomach looks right now. What once was a baby bump, has now transformed into wilted jiggling water balloon that sloshes around when I walk or lay down.

Yup, here we go again, watching the sun go down, putting our son to bed and wondering what the night will hold for us when it comes to our daughter.

I love sunrises, not only are they beautiful, but it means that I and my family have survived the night. The night is dark and long, causing strange thoughts can begin to creep into your sleep deprived mind. You begin to wonder things like, what would happen if you bred a sheep with gopher? Would it be cute? A platypus is cute and that looks like it was three animals bred together.

Here we go again on our own, going down the only road we’ve ever known. The newborn road. But you know the best part of it this time? This time I can look at my son, my amazing little two and half year old son and know without a shadow of a doubt that all of the sleepless nights, all of the sore nipples and wondering whether it’s hunger or gas making her cry, it’s for a short time. It all is. Even her snuggling with me and longing to be held. It’s all for a short time and all of the challenges and the joys of this age will fade into the background as she grows, to be replaced with others.

They say the second child is easier because you’ve already taken care of a newborn once and have the skills needed to do it. I think that the second child is easier because you have perspective, even at 2AM, when you hear that coo. You know that coo for better or worse won’t be there forever and that might be the happiest and saddest thought you could ever have.


  1. Meredith, I could have written this myself. Our 3rd was born on 2/13 and we are in the same boat. And I especially hate the darkness, it messes with my mind far too much. Good luck!


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