I remember when I was a young adult and feeling like I needed space from my mother. I do not know if it was just the rebellious decade of the 70’s or the fact that it seemed my mom needed to be involved all the time. Fortunately, I do believe that needing space from our parents is part of growing up into a “real adult.” and totally normal. After the birth of my first daughter it began to sink in that my mom did know a thing or two that I should be paying attention to. I did need her to help me learn about some of the normal things babies did. As I watched my mother being a grandmother, I saw a different person. A new part of who my mom was.
Emily ( now 30) was a colicky baby. The only way to help her settle was to be constantly moving, walking, using a baby swing, putting her in the bassinet and rocking it. I was exhausted. This is when for the first time watching my mother dancing, pacing, and singing to this unhappy baby she really was a great grandmother. She is now 85 years old continuing to work full time and drives 5 hours to Vermont to visit. Amazing.
These memories have started me thinking about how will I be a grandma to my son’s soon to be child. I love babies. That was part of the reason I became a L&D nurse and dedicated my professional life to caring for women and their babies. My son lives in Utah. So being a grandparent from a distance will be another new unknown. Jake calls frequently to ask how to help his wife adjust to all the physical changes of the first trimester of pregnancy. What can she take for nausea, how come she sleeps a lot, the next question I got a real kick out of,” mom can Sarah go four-wheeling to the grand canyon? Is it safe? ” So maybe this is what it will be like. More frequent phone calls and Skype. I will get to see this little person grow and change.
As women become mothers we learn what it was like for our own mother’s raising children. There is nothing that can teach us as much about our parents than becoming a parent . A new life just brings such joy and adventure.
Can any of you relate to understanding and seeing your parents differently after becoming a mother?
[typography font=”Satisfy” size=”24″ size_format=”px”]Written by: Jan Ling[/typography]
You are going to be such a good long distance grandma! My kids have 3 long distance grandmothers and it is still a very special relationship they have with each of them. It’s obvious you love babies, thanks for loving on mine!