My Top Five “What Were They Thinking?” Toys

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I was driving home one day after picking up both of my boys from childcare.  As usual, my oldest was chatting away about different things from his day.

“Mama!’ he piped up.

“Yes sweetie” I answered, eyes on the road and half paying attention, thinking more about how long I would have to cook dinner after getting home and placing the baby on the floor, to play with whatever (safe) toys he could find.

“There’s this doll.  It’s a Lalaloopsy.  You feed her something orange and then press her tummy and she poops out an orange charm!”

Ok, needle skip off the record – what?!  Now we don’t watch commercial tv.  Not in a “We are better than you” kind of way.  More like “Our tv is downstairs and I have to be upstairs to clean lunch boxes/bottles/dishes/laundry/watch the baby” kind of way.  This is what Netflix is for in my house.

I dismissed this doll.  No way would a company make something so absurd.  But after hearing about this more than once on the way home (apparently seen at childcare) I had to look it up.

Did you know that this is, in fact, a real toy?  Not only that, but there are quite a few of these types of toys out there.  So much so that I had to compile my top five list of what I like to call “What were they thinking?”

lalaloopsy - mgm entertainment
photo courtesy of MGM Entertainment

Lalaloopsy Babies Diaper Surprise  

My son was right.  I should know to never question him on this stuff.  He has an amazing imagination but where would this have come from?  Do you see that there on the box?  It says, “I magically poop charms”.  I mean, really?  You want to find something magical that won’t cost $65?  Go change your brother’s diaper.

gooey louie - goliath
Photo courtesy of Goliath

Gooey Louie 

Pull the gooey boogers out until his head pops open!  I have no words.  Actually, I lied.  I do.  We have a hard enough time keeping our 4 years old’s finger out of his own nose, now I should buy him a game where he picks someone else’s?  I don’t think so.   Someone got paid to design this.  In real money!

doggie doo - goliath
photo courtesy of Goliath

 

Doggie Doo – The Famous Dog Poop Game

Oh, I didn’t know it was famous.  According to the write up “Kids laugh as they clean up after the dog – a fun way to learn about responsibility.”  I can teach responsibility.  How about taking care of the REAL animals that live in our home and poop in our yard?  No one laughs joyously in my house when it comes to scooping the litter boxes.  I guess we should make a game out of it!

hot potato - fundex
photo courtesy of Fundex

Hot Potato Electronic Musical Passing Game

Save yourself $13 and go buy a potato from the store for fifty cents.  Now play some music and toss it around.  The music stops and who ever is left with the potato loses.  You’re welcome.

hello barbie - mattel
photo courtesy of Mattel

Hello Barbie Doll

I put this one in for my husband, who is quite knowledgable in all things electronic.  Hey, why not hand your child a barbie that can recognize your child’s voice and respond accordingly?  Aside from children needing to converse with real people, the fact that your child can tell barbie all of her secrets and then have some weirdo hack into barbie to listen along?  No thanks.

In short, there are so many quality toys out there.  Toys that promote imagination, problem solving, family fun, and camaraderie.  This holiday season, how about spending your hard earned money on one of those?

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